Monday, March 19, 2007

Happy Birthday War In Iraq!!!

Ohmigosh, it seems like it was just yesterday that you were the twinkle in those Neo-con's eyes, and look at you now!

You are getting to be such a big boy, all grown up. Of course, you have a lot more years of growing up to do!

This party is a lot like the ones back in the day, why I well remember going to the fourth birthday party of your cousin Vietnam War. I'm guessing the food at your party if a lot better, you know how much I love hummous!

Oh, we are going to play party games! I love games! Drill-a-hole-in-a-Sunni-Arab is one of my favorites! Here, let me put this plastic rain poncho on you before they hand you the Black-n-Decker, and make sure you leave it on for the Shite Pinata afterwards! Oh look, the party napkins have torture scenes from Abu ghraib on them. Collect all 128!!!

Did you get any good presents from Gramps and Grama? Oh! Your own personal Improvised Explosive Device? I hear that all the lil terrorists are clamoring for them. You are so lucky that Bombs-R-Us wasn't sold out! When you are a grown up, like me, maybe you'll get to push the big red button and blow up even bigger things! Like restaurants filled with people! What a bad time to make a reservation!

Oh dear, I really must be going back to the Green Zone and crawl back down into my bunker. Yes, I hate to miss the rest of the party, but rumor has it that one of those super fun chlorine tank bombs is going to explode in the market and I forgot, darn it, to bring my gas mask!

Well, little boy, I hope your next four years are as exciting, wonderful, and optimistic as the last four years. Now give Uncle George a kiss on the cheek and I'll be off.

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