Homer'sWorld

Assimilation completed. When we last saw Snowball he was sitting on my lap and partly tamed. He has now had a bath, combed, and shown what a litter box is. His assimilation as a pet is complete.

I have been a vegetarian since January 1983. The last piece of meat that I purposely chomped was a piece of sausage, and that was it. Since then I have occasionally accidentally eaten things that had lard or meat hidden away. The last time was a salad at a local restaurant where chicken showed up in the bottom of the bowl. I always ask, nicely, whether certain foods have lard or chicken stock (rice and beans), and have discovered that waiters sometimes lie- an hour later it all comes up.

When I came out as a vegetarian you would have thought I had told my parents I was a homosexual, they were so horrified. My mother fretted that I wasn't going to get the proper nutrition- this was back in the day that people were convinced you had to eat Bean A with Bread B and Vegetable C or you would die from some painful protein deficiency. My father was very angry that I wouldn't eat meat and when I cooked he ALWAYS said, "Well, this would be good if only it had some meat in it." This included whatever desserts I made. Kidding. He died from a heart attack after having a stroke- his arteries were clogged with bologna from 1968 and hamburger from 1976.

Up until the mid-1990s I would get very, very negative comments from straight men about being a vegetarian. You would think I had took them I was gay. It was somehow threatening to them.

I was never interested in telling other people what to eat, and never tried to convince people that being a vegetarian was better. So it always surprised me when my father's friends would say nasty things about me. I guess people are less uptight about the whole issue, because I never hear crap like that anymore.

I became a vegetarian because I grew up on a farm and fed all of the animals and decided that they have personalities just like humans. Animals, even chickens, have emotions and feelings and for the most part want to enjoy life. I would rather hang out with Henny-Penny and have her cluck at me, than have her roasting in the oven and traveling through my intestines.

Now that I have been writing this, the reaction I got for coming out as a vegetarian was very similar to the reaction I got as coming out as a fag. "Are you happy?" "Will you starve?" "Want to eat some meat?"

So on election day I said that nasty thing ("You are a cunt") after being told by Ms. Conservative Values 2008 that faggots were basically the same as murderers, and somehow I thought that was an isolated thingy. You'd think by now that most people have gotten the news that us homos are really normal folks who sometimes do anal, and yet sometimes they read interesting recipes on the intertubes and make fattening foods, just like regular folks.

But apparently not. The Republicans are so fucking desperate for something to regain support. And the evil fags are all they have left. So you have that Colorado state senator repeating the tired "Homos is killers" theme (so 2008!). The new head of the Republican party saying that civil unions would be "crazy" (particularly bizarre given that his ancestors were denied the right to marry, since they were property and not people).

And that guy from North Carolina babbling about the evils of queer marriage. While sporting the queerest, queeniest hairdon't I have ever seen.

















Hon. Jim Forrester.

I was looking for his picture to illustrate this and came across a whole bunch on Google Image Search, and I can't stop staring at his hairdon't. What the fuck is he thinking?


















HAIRDON'T!

The first picture I saw wasn't just some fluke, some bizarre photo-shopped creation. Every single fucking picture of this sanctimonious bastard has him sporting this dippy-doo, curlique thing perched on top of his head.













Triptych.

He babbles on about the sanctity of marriage shit. Right, so how come I get total child-molester vibes, in my non-accusatory opinion, when I gayze at his photographs? Also, if you happen to have the copyrights to these pictures, I am using them to illustrate a point. My point being, anti-homosexual "men" almost always have grooming faults. And apparently the women-folks in their lives are too chicken to point them out. And of course straight men aren't very good at pointing out grooming failures. And us homos are unlikely to point them out as a public service, because lord knows, we don't really want to talk to menz who make the hair on your neck stand up because they are so fucking creepy.

I just feel sorry for Mrs. Forrester, who has to assume the wifely position while Jim sticks hisself inside her and I imagine all she can do is think, "I hope that curl doesn't fall off while he is doing his business." And if it did fall off, would she interrupt his sanctity of marriage stuff to tell him, "Jim, your hair fell. Again." And if not, would she lie there with that curl draped over her face while he wheezed away and she thinks about new wallpaper or drapes? Or whether Alice will be making that delicious chocolate cake for the Senator's wives' club meetings? Or wishing she was having hot dyke sex instead, because Jim spends more time on his curliques that on her clitoris?

I don't know. Sometimes my mind acts in mysterious ways. Anyways, I think it must suck to be evil Bigot-Americans grasping at straws when you are on the wrong side of history. No one ever puts bigots on stamps in our fine country. I wonder how long before we have a Harvey Milk stamp?

I am the lion tamer.

How long did it take me to mostly tame little Snowball? Three days...

Snowball.

Good lord, he has testicles. So the last two mornings I was able to entice him to eat some food next to me and I reached down and grabbed him by the back of his net and petted him as he hissed at me. And tonight I did the same, but after I let him go he followed me around and meowed at me until I picked him up.

Lap baby.

I'm going to spend the next few days picking him up, combing him, and otherwise socializing him. Then he will go off to the Humane Society to find a new home. He is so pretty I am sure that won't take long.

Lion!

New curtains.

























Vegetables!

In the summer my kitchen will be darker and cooler.

Little Snowball let me pat her cute furry head this morning. We also played with a stick together. When I walked away she meowed at me to come back. Mummy says I am a lion tamer.

Just a moment ago I watched a very healthy-looking coyote contentedly scratch itself from my office window. Unfortunately, my camera battery is charging so no photograph.

Tonight is library night and Safeway night with Mummy. She is busy making me new curtains for my kitchen. I picked out the fabric at the quilting store on Saturday and the women there were so excited that a man was buying cloth, "Look he's tall and handsome!" one of them cried out (really, that is a quote). And then I ruined their crafting fantasies by telling them I am gay. Cruel and heartless I am. Anyways, the new curtains have turnips, onions, and asparagus in bright purple and green, I'll take a picture when they are hung up.

So yesterday I met up with Rob, my roommate at U of Michigan in 1984-1985. We last saw each other back in 1990 or 1991. I've changed more than he has physically. He has three daughters, we both have been working for other companies since the early 90s. It was nice to catch up and I'll be seeing him again soon.




















Rob and Homer.


Then in the evening I went over to David G.'s house and Abe and Kevin joined us for Amazing Race. Kevin just moved back to Tucson after being gone for three years.


And in other news, Doug and I worked on the windows yesterday and we managed to only break three of them as we removed loose putty and scraped paint. I took all of the old hardware off and soaked the pieces in nasty paint remover, and now I need to buy some off-white paint and paint the windows before I re-attach the hardware. Owning an old house means never-ending projects to fix it up.


Yesterday the newspaper reported that the average price houses are selling for in Phoenix is $135k and in Tucson $160k. In Phoenix, the price has dropped from $234k, that is $99k in one year. Yikes.

Mummy says her name is Snowball. She's a little Siamese kitten with bright blue eyes that appeared in my backyard.



















Snowball.

Very wild, but today I gave her some food and she let me get within a few feet of her. I'd like to tame her and then find a home for the little thing. She is very pretty and petite.

My important thoughts for today:

- Avett Brothers are coming to Tucson on May 7 and Forrest and I will be going.

- Spring has arrived and the birds are chirpy and the flowers are starting to bloom and all that business.

- Tucson has two newspapers and one is closing shop in March and the other has become a worthless piece of crap. I have a subscription because Mummy does the crosswords, but after she leaves I'm done with that rag. I should never, ever read the online comments to their articles because they are always vile. Why newspapers continue to allow people to call homosexuals "perverts" and the like puzzles me. Exactly why is this acceptable and the use of the "n word" not?

- Brian is coming down for a visit Sunday. My college roommate from junior year at U of Michigan contacted me through Facebook and we are meeting up Sunday as well. I haven't seen Rob in person since 1990 or so.

- Later: Three coyotes just walked by my window, I was alerted by the neighbor's dogs excitedly barking.

Henny-Penny!!! For Jimbo.

List of my maternal great-great grandparents siblings names.

Philip David: George, Mary, Louisa, Ernest, Susanna, Jacob, Catherine, Christiana, Daniel
Juliana: Jacob, Frederick, Mary, Elizabeth, Henry, Catherine
David Green: Caroline, Winfield, William
Sarah DeEtte: Bertha, Florence, Frances, Charles, Mary, Fannie
Elijah Leland: James, George, Benjamin, Alvorado
Edna Helen: Ebenezer, Phebe, Susanah, William, Jonathan, Emmet, Edwin, Wilson, Benjamin
Isaac Hiram: Louisa, Clara, Barbara, Harriet, George
Anna Marie Dortea: Auguste, Emil, Herman, Otto, Edith

Most of these people were born in the 1840s to 1860s.

The public art component of the 4th Avenue Underpass project, will be 7,000 small ceramic tiles, each bearing the portrait of people in Tucson. Today, Patrick and I went over and had our pictures taken.

























Patrick poses.

The photography was very quick, six pictures snapped and transferred to a screen.

The photographer.

We were allowed to select the photo we liked, the photographer cropped it, and then it was time for the next person.

























Brady poses.

Patrick called Brady and I called Forrest and we insisted they participate.



















Forrest poses.

Someday when you come to town I'll take you to the underpass and point out our smiling faces.

Work continues on the house. Doug and Julian spent the morning applying stucco and working on the windows.
























Doug is unsticking wndows.

A lot of the windows need the rope replaced that is attached to the pulleys and weights.
























Julian applying another coat of stucco.

Henny-Penny supervised.
























Henny-Penny.

I made lemon pudding for Amazing Race tonight. Very exciting day.

A pair of lesbians obtained a wedding license in Tucson yesterday.

The world did not end. No heterosexual marriages were destroyed. But if you read the nasty comments to that newspaper story you would think these women were satanic.

As I commented, the only thing you should say when someone gets engaged or married is "Congratulations."

After the haircut.

I'm out of sorts because of a wicked nightmare I had this morning. I should never stay in bed past 6 AM because this is the time those dreams happen. There are three main ones I have:

1). Hurry-Hurry!- me trying to get people to leave a place where a disaster is happening or about to happen.

2). Forgot to drop that class!- I suddenly realize the semester is ending and I didn't drop that math or language class.

3). I accidentally took something!- from a historical society or a store and I have to figure out how to return it so they won't find out.

How come I couldn't have dreams about furry redheads? Or me digging up a bunch of statues? Or winning the lottery? Or eating yellow cake with chocolate frosting?

On the way to work, before the haircut.

























I always wear a safety belt, and you should too.

Rained for two days here, no snow at my elevation but you can see it up in the mountains. Mummy complains that it is too cold. I explain that she needs to leave the little heater on at night instead of unplugging it. She watches me cook now, deciding that I know some things that she should know. Mummy has never liked to cook, but now with the celiac disease, she has to. She is lucky that there are a number of gluten-free products available now.

Almost forgot that this Saturday is a single person's least favorite helliday. Mexican Safeway has displays of pathetic daffodils and velvet-boxed chocolates. I just walk on by and wonder what ever happened to Byron. I miss him. My new Safeway bf is Michael the pharmacist, who is handsome and helpful and has a nice beard. Unfortunately, I only get to see him when I take Mummy over there to get something (maybe today!).

She's watching you.

Some family photographs. My great-great grandfather was a member of the Michigan state Legislature for several terms in the early 1900s. He was a Republican back when Republicans were for civil rights.






















David Green Chandler (1847-1929).

David was married in February 1872 to Sarah DeEtte Pierce and their first child, a son named John, was born in August 1873. My great-grandmother, Grace Lee Chandler, was born in November 1875. A third child, Garfield David Chandler, was born in May 1881 but died from appendicitis when he was 19-years-old.




















Hand-colored tintype of Grace, circa 1880-1882.

The Chandlers were farmers and were quite successful, in all of the photographs they are well dressed. Unfortunately, DeEtte died unexpectedly from a stroke in 1898- she was only slightly older than I am today.

























DeEtte Chandler (1851-1898) and Grace (1875-1929).

David would go on to be elected County Sheriff and married a woman named Minnie as his second wife. She would later die from alcoholism. David outlived all of his children, and when he died no one had money to purchase a tombstone for his grave.

Grace (back row, right) and her brother John (seated, right) (1873-1925).

My grandfather had a heart attack in April 1972 and as he lay dying in the hospital he asked my grandmother and uncle to purchase a tombstone for his grandfather, and one was made to match the one for DeEtte.

A couple of years ago I was helping my friend Bob (hi Bob!) with his family history and discovered that he also had a Chandler ancestor and that Mummy and he were distant cousins.

I lay in bed and listened to the rain last night. Puff rested his head on my shoulder and occasionally reached out to pat my face, reminding me that everything is about him. I have to hold his paw in my hand before he will stop doing that.


























African daisies.

The rains will make the wildflowers bloom, I can see the daisies coming up in my front yard.

Doug enclosed my laundry room back in 2004 or so. I've finally gotten around to have him stucco it to match the house. He has put down tarpaper, then covered that with chicken wire and has started to apply the scratch coat. When that is done he'll bring someone else in to put the finish coat on so that it matches the rest of the house. Fancy! Next up, I'm having him go around and re-putty windows and repair or replace the original screen windows. I may have him repair some of the sashes so that I can actually raise and lower a few of the windows in the 1927 part of my house.

What's next? I'm making a gluten-free carrot cake for Mummy for supper with Jeffrey S. Haven't figured out what else I'll make. Last night I invented gluten-free onion rings, and they came out pretty well, if I can boast about such things.

Mama Cat has been blind for about a year now. She manages pretty well- always finds the litter box and knows where the food and water dishes are.

























Mama Cat poses.

She is probably around 13-years-old and other than being blind and having awful ear wax (let me telling you, cleaning that out is gross), she is physically doing well. She tends to walk in circles which can be disconcerting to first time visitors. But all that walking has kept her petite, unlike Ms. Joey, who has quite a belly on her.

I wish Mummy would do some walking, but convincing her to do anything is impossible. I cook healthy meals and she eats snacks for lunch. She sits around reading most of the day, and then finds it difficult to walk around. What can you do, she is very stubborn. I need a break.

Sandy is heading back to his soap opera, Australia, where the writers have many action-packed episodes planned. Don't worry, there will be a special cross-over event in July when Sandy, Mark, and Zane return to Tucson.
























Sandy and Martha.

Viewers will be excited to learn that Forrest is moving into the guest house. Who knows what adventures will ensue!




















Henny-Penny.

Forrest thinks Henny-Penny is lonely, that's why she spends a lot of time staring in the windows. So I may have to get her a friend to hang out with.

I had a dream where I was transported back in time to when I was 19-years-old, but I remembered everything up until today. When Iw as 19 I was tall, very skinny, poorly dressed, had crooked teeth, low self esteem, was pretty lost at the University of Michigan, in the closet, miserable. If I could go back I'd certainly make some changes- go to the gym, get braces earlier, get a different haircut (just say no to "feathered back!"). I'd also save my money from my $2.65 an hour job and buy some Microsoft stock in 1983.

I am such a different person that I was in 1982-1983. I mean, totally different. Still tall, but now I have a bit of a belly. I dress for comfort (I could use some nicer clothes). Teeth= fixed. Self esteem much improved. No longer a follower. Very, very out. My hair is grown out and while many people have said they like it better that way, I hate waking up in the morning with it sticking up in a million unattractive ways. And I still don't have any fancy Microsoft stock (what was I thinking?).

And in other news, Henny Penny followed me around the yard this morning, seeing what I was doing. After I came inside she jumped up on the window sill and watched my mother doing her crossword puzzles. She doesn't need television when she can watch us through the windows.

Tonight, dinner with Sandy and Mummy at Rosa's!

I listened to NPR today (Talk of the Nation) and they were talking about whether the Culture Wars were over. One of the male callers began angrily stating that if homosexuals were allowed to get married, next pedophilia would be legalized.

Are fundamentalists really that crazy? Or mentally ill? I am pretty sure that many (most?) are somewhat unbalanced. The need to force other people to act in a certain way is very strong within the Mormon, Evangelical, and Catholic Churches nowadays. For some reason it infuriates them that Queers, Trannies, Feminists, and racial minorities aren't behaving themselves, according to their rigid mental paradigms.

So what is going to happen? They are on the wrong side of civil rights and will eventually lose. Must suck to be in that position. Yes, we have had temporary setbacks, but perhaps in my lifetime gay marriage will be legalized.

Just need to find a husband so I can have a Big Gay Marriage. Better get busy with that.

Like most of the rest of the country, the economic downturn is hitting Arizona hard. The main economic force in the Grand Canyon State was the construction industry, and no one is building or buying houses anymore. Home prices are dropping dramatically. Tax revenue has been dramatically reduced and since the Republicans cut taxes during the good years, we are facing something like a 20 percent shortfall. We are supposed to have a Rainy Day Fund, but since it wasn't adequately funded, there isn't much money to fall back on.

The result, to the glee of the Republicans, are massive cuts for education, healthcare, cultural attractions, and environmental clean-up. Arizona already was ranked 49th in terms of education funding. I guess when you are 50th the only place you can go is up.

Since the Republicans from the Phoenix area run the state, and because southern Arizona is largely Democratic, we get a greater share of the cutbacks. This includes closing most of the state parks in southern Arizona. The University of Arizona is requiring employees to take 10 unpaid days leave this semester. And so on. They expect that next year will be much worse.

The Republican response? "We will not raise taxes." Currently, Arizona residents pay less than 4 percent of our income in state income taxes. I guess I am one of those horrible liberals who thinks having the government take care of roads, schools, universities, and parks is a good thing, since I lack the expertise to do so.

Cutting education funding when thousands of unemployed people are going back to school is stupid. Cutting funding for state parks when people need a local attraction to visit, since they can't afford vacations, is also stupid. Republican legislators, and the people who vote for them, are the most stupid.