Homer'sWorld

I don't get the whole "gay face" thing. Does Leno ask other actors to make "soldier face" or "housewife face" or politician face," depending on what roles they have previously played?


Orange blossoms.

Maybe I'm just not paying attention and when I walk around everyone knows I'm queer because of some subtle way my lips are pursed, eyes crossed, and my left cheek puckered. Who knew?


A poppy in Vince's garden.

I don't have functioning gaydar in Arizona anyways.


Joey and Daddy.

The quickest way to tell I'm gay, listen to me talk to my cats.

While I was busy saving the world at work, this female ground squirrel was watching me through the little window in my office.


Squirrel!

She was probably wishing I would come outside in the beautiful weather and give her some bird seed.

I accidently heard President Clusterfuck yipping on NPR sometime in the last couple of days. "Economy is still great, let's cut the taxes some more."

Fuck me with a garden rake. Here in Tucson:

- furniture stores are having amazing sales (no one is buying furniture)
- houses are dropping in value and many aren't selling
- grocery prices, especially bread and dairy products, have risen dramatically
- gas is cheapest in the country at $3.15, but filling the tank up now costs more that $30.

I'm doing alright, basically because I behave myself and don't tend to spend money on frivolous things. I don't know how other people are able to get by, especially people who live out in the country, like my sister and mother back in Michigan.

Only 300 more days of President Clusterfuck. Wonder what kind of trouble he'll get us into during that time?

Pizza and a bear.

Brady and I hung out and talked and watched a movie and had pizza.



Brooklyn Pizza.

He had pepperoni and I opted for olive, onion, and spinach. He made faces every time I pointed the camera at him, so no picture.

We chatted about travel, weight gain and loss, whether Will Smith is hot, and bladder cancer (avoid if possible). It was nice to spend some time with Brady, although I was a total allergy-fest afterwards.

My father, back row, third from left.



The funny thing- he really hated being a farmer. He was awful at it, we never made any money, he had poor business sense.

Those years on the farm made me who I am, in many ways (not afraid of hard work, able to identify strange artifacts, an appreciation for animals), but I hated every fucking minute of it.

And yet I find that I wouldn't mind having a chicken coop and a nice garden, except nice Midwestern gardens don't grow in Tucson.

Battlestar Gallactica weekend. Watched five DVDs worth of episode, season 3. One more to go. Brady and Patrick have fancy cable so I'll be watching Season 4 with those guys. I'm such a science fiction nerd.

The odometer reached 100,000 on the way to the airport this morning.


Miles.

Jimbo's fourth annual visit is over and the house is quiet. We had a fun time, as always. He got to see some new birds and I hosted a fun party. The cats had a vomit-fest this morning and one night I woke Jim up due to a back ache and a loud computer fan, but those were little things.


Jimbo does living history at the Presidio Park.

I'm going to DC (and TJ and I are going to explore Baltimore) in July or early August. I'll get to hang out with Jimbo and Archerr and who knows who else. I'm glad I have such good friends.

Arizona Highways.

The April issue of Arizona Highways has a story about the two burials I excavated last October. The story is well done, with only a few factual errors.


Photo by Ed McCain.

Brian was kind enough to extract the photo for me.

LATER: Email me if you'd like a pdf file of the article.

Cost of making me cranky: $8.00.

1). Car failed emissions on Thursday, February 28.
2). Car sensor fixed at dealership on Monday, March 1. Told to drive at least 200 miles before going back to re-test.
3). Car retested on Friday, March 7 and passed. Registration mailed in on the same day.
4). It takes until Friday, March 14 for them to open the envelope.
5). They fine me $8 for mailing it in late.
6). To refute the fine I have to go to a DMV office with the documentation that I passed emissions.
7). Said documentation was sent to Phoenix with my registration stuff, as required, and apparently discarded by them.
8). Now, that was easy.

Or to do it for free, call me a liar, a thief, or a cult member. That is also easy.

We stopped on our way to Phoenix at the ostrich farm.


Lorakeet.

For $5.00 you get a container of large green pellets and a little container of nectar for the lorakeets to drink.


No teeth.

I impressed the impressionable teenage girls by feeling the ostriches by hand and even letting them put their enormous mouths on my hand. Their "bite" is nothing compared to our old goose Oscar, now that was a bite!


Donkey.

The donkeys looked melancholy. We did not go into the deer area because they looked like they had mange. We then returned to our journey north.


Darin, Jimbo, and Homer.

We met up with Darin, former blogger Chris, and Chris' boyfriend Michael at Roscoe's and had a few drinky-poos and some deep-fried "food." It was nice to sit and chat. No one recognized us. Later we went to another bar and then we went and watched the Phoenix rugby team roll on the ground. The drive back to Tucson was uneventful.

Too tired to post.

Ostrich!

Whirlwind trip to Phoenix and back.

Oh Lord. A busy day of bird and turtle watching, lunch, shopping, reading, dinner, dessert, and back home. I am pooped! Jimbo has some pictures of the wildlife we saw at the Sweetwater Wetlands, which they could rename the Sweetwater Fartlands because of the somewhat fetid smell. I liked the turtles the best, as always.

Tomorrow a trip north to Phoenix to see Darrin and Brian!

The Party in Six Pictures:


Ray, Richard, Cobban, and David.



Decorating ensues.



Gallus gallus ova, boiled and decorated.


The guests prepare for the Quest in the rain. Jimbo, Cobban, Vince, and Jim have blogs.


The Quest for the Egg.



The winners: Patrick (1st), Andrew (3rd), and Zoe (2nd).

Everybody had a nice time. Thanks for coming!

Rage-inducing lemon meringue!!!

It's like holding a bomb!

Seven egg white meringue! Towering! Seven egg whites, count 'em! Good lord, it's probably illegal in Idaho. Jimbo is lucky that it didn't come alive and start it's own blog! Possible titles, "Defying Meringue-icity" or "Lemon Meringue Tales" or maybe "Awesome, Dude!" but the last one is probably already taken.

Can you tell I'm been eating malted milk balls?!!!

How to make Puff mad.



Outside Kitty poses.

Seeing that human feeding Outside Kitty and then taking a picture with him. Meanwhile, Puff is meowing very angrily through the screen door.

Jimbo is here, we went out to the Venture Inn and had a nice time chatting the leather men up. He's sleeping in and in a few minutes I'm making potato salad and 4-bean salad and frosting and maybe an angelfood cake (because I managed to buy too many eggs).

Non-Denominational Boiled Egg Decorating and Backyard Egg Hunt Party pictures later today.

A decision has been made. Chocolate cake with chocolate frosting. Jimbo also asked for a lemon meringue pie and I swear, it will have the largest, fluffiest meringue pie ever! Huge! Awe-inspiring and rage-inducing!

It is a good thing my mother isn't here because I'd have two or three little Chihuahuas running around the house. Alright, I just don't know about the crazy news lately. People with 800 dogs in a triple-wide and a woman growing a toilet seat and crazy Geraldine running her mouth at a bazillion miles an hour. Crazy!

Those little critters would just get in the way Sunday when I have my annual Non-Denominational Egg Decorating and Backyard Egg Hunt! I hope nobody gets maimed this year!

1970.


First grade.

Mrs. Gray had us draw a picture of ourselves as adults, "What you want to be when you grow up," she said. I drew a scientist with a magnifying glass.

Today someone asked my opinion, "You're a scientist, what do you think about this?" he said. I almost laughed because of that Recent Incident.

I still have the little pug nose (thanks Mummy!). I wish I had a plaid shirt like that. They had good boys' fashions back in the early 1970s. Our pants always stayed up and we often wore clip-on ties to class, carefully removing them for recess. I also remember that blowing milk was considered a very naughty thing to do. I wonder what Mrs. Gray would think about me now. She was certainly a mean old thing, but I suppose thirty years of first graders will do that to anybody.

1907.


Byron, David, and Harold.

David only has a few months to live. My grandfather is Harold, with the long hair. I imagine that when he looked at this picture later in life it was with a mixture of embarassment and sadness.

The Big Question.

What is more important- that the Governor of New York (may have) fucked a prostitute or that five United States soldiers died in Iraq today?

This is why I feel so alienated by the news media.

I happened to catch CNN at the airport in January and was horrified at the sheer stupidity of the shit thrown at the audience. Pretty talking heads screeching over and over again about the latest blonde woman kidnapped/missing/murdered while boring, unphotogenic stories, like the massacre of people in Darfu or Iraq gets a little line along the bottom of the screen because you don't want to upset sensible peoples' sensibilities by showing what happens when you throw a metal scrap at human flesh at a couple hundred miles an hour.

Yes, it is disappointing that Mr. Spitzer chatted up a hooker while he was in DC. But is anyone surprised? Men are pigs, they often think with their genitals. How many of the reporters and anchor people excitedly relaying this garbage to us are pure and untainted. And if there are pure and untainted, why? I'm immediately suspicious of people who claim moral superiority over others. People have instincts that sometimes (often) drive them to do socially prescribed things. Goodness knows, I've probably done some things I shouldn't have.

Fu manchu Sunday.


Heading down to visit with Cobban and Ray. Last Thursday I had dinner with Brian and a beer with John and his bf Jason. I feel like a socialite or a debutante or something similar.

Jimbo's coming in a week. What kind of dessert should I make?

A). Yellow cake with chocolate frosting.
B). Carrot cake with cream cheese frosting.
C). Angelfood cake with lemon curd.
D). Coconut cake with coconut cream cheese frosting.

Vote in the comment section, and help make history.

Calm moment.



Look at the pretty poppies. They smell nice. Pretty colors. Nice. Calming. Oh! Birds are singing too, but you can't hear it. Everything is nice outside. Pretty poppies.

I dread John McCain becoming the president. I don't have any respect for the man, he's my United States Senator and he fell off his pedastal over the last couple of years. War-mongerer, panderer, suck-up to the Bush conservatives.

The chances are very slim that Hillary Clinton can beat John McCain. He's branded as a war hero, a maverick, a straight talker. A lot of that is bullshit, but there are a lot of voters who want a war hero in a time of "war." Speaking of which, exactly who are we at war with? I thought the Iraqi government was our ally?

Hillary Clinton is branded as the wife of Bill Clinton by many, many people. Many of these people hate her. My own mother can't stand her for reasons she cannot explain.

If a Republican becomes president our country is fucked. Endless war. War with Iran. Poor people can just go fuck themselves. Gay people, especially, are fucked and not in a good way. McCain will reward his base by putting very conservative people in the Supreme Court. You can wave goodbye to whatever civil rights straight folks might throw at us gays.

So this is what I have been wondering. Do people who support Clinton honestly, realistically think she can be elected? It seems completely impossible to me.

Spring time. The first daffofil has bloomed. I have tulips and irises poking up too.


Daffodil.

Today's task- decorate some cookies created with Grandma F.'s cutters.



They didn't come out as well as I hoped, but are still cute.

Rob asked how Mama Cat is doing. I'm still grinding up pills, mixing with milk, and squirting it in her mouth twice a day. She hates, hates, hates that. Also the eye drops. Sometimes she cries out because the pills are nasty.

Her eyes were almost back to normal and then it started again. The animal opthamalogist doesn't know why it is happening. Every test possible except for bone marrow (for cancer) was done. If she has cancer I won't do the chemo thing- I heard what happened to my co-workers cats and Mama Cat doesn't need that.

She can maneuver around really well. Once in a while in the middle of the night she gets frustrated and cries out and I go find her and put her in bed with me. She likes to sleep on my chest and will lie there and purr quietly. I wish she wasn't going through this, but at least she's getting the best care possible.

Post 1523. A few weeks ago I sent Moby an email alerting him that someone in Tucson was using his roommate's pic on a CraigsList advert. Moby emailed me back to say that he got the message while he and his roommate were eating dinner, they had a laugh about it. A while ago, I sent another blogger an email to tell him that his pics were being used on an online profile site. Brian and I were chatting late last night and he mentioned that he's seen pictures he's taken used on someone's personal ad too.

Really, this isn't all that funny.

If you are going to steal pictures of someone off the internet and claim that they are you, the smart thing is to pick pictures of a nobody. Don't use those of porn stars, well known celebrities, authors, bloggers, bloggers' roommates, bloggers' mothers, and bloggers' mothers' hairdresser's first cousin twice removed from Romania.

Actually the smart thing is to not steal pictures of anybodies or nobodies. Don't use other pictures in place of your own. It is stupid. It is deceitful. It makes all your claims of being truthful vanish instantly. You have the option of 1). using your own picture, 2). not using a picture at all, or 3). using someone else's picture. Numbers 1 and 2 are acceptable. Number 3, that's a mega no-no.

In conclusion, that is my opinion on the topic.


Yes, it's me.

Leap year .2. A morning spent at the Saturn dealership getting a new sensor placed in the car so I can pass an emissions test. I wandered around the lot and came to the concluson that all of the new Saturns are either unattractive or too expensive or both. So I guess I will be driving around the 99 Saturn for a while longer.

Work going well, the last few weeks have been very productive. I'm making good progress on finishing several reports. Science!

Best news- Jimbo is coming to visit in mid-March. We have an excellent time hanging out (even last year's mega-allergy mess was alright). This year we intend to go up to Phoenix and visit with Brian, John,and Darin. I'll also have a little party at my house and invite bloggers Cobban (and his bf Ray), Frank, Jim, Panchesco, (and maybe Lee?), and my regular kinda friends Brady, Patrick, Bob, and Steve will have to come over and play games. Will I make lemon meringue? Only time will tell.

In other, completely unrelated news, my goatee is getting very bushy. You could do residue analysis, I'm sure, and determine what I had for dinner last week. Will it stay, again, only time will tell.

I feel sorry for Mark Whitecotton. He is the blogger from the Baltimore, Maryland area who has created numerous blogs pretending to be different people. As 'Marc' he died a tragic death from cancer in 2006. As 'Josh,' 'Marc's' brother, he is undergoing chemo. As 'Steve' he is testifying at a murder trial. And so on. It's really pathetic.

He doesn't like me- I exposed his lies about the 11-year-old girl (he claimed she was murdered, she died a natural death) in August 2007 and ever since then he has posted on his various blogs lots of crap about me. You can search on technorati and find many of those entries. He claims I'm a liar, I'm jealous of him, I've threatened other bloggers with death- that's a good one! My favorite- I write too much about lemon meringue pies.

Now he's fixated on the fact that I'm a scientist. You can go read his pathetic entry here. Oh look, he stole a picture of me from the Arizona Daily Star website. I wonder if he asked permission. That's something he's always doing, stealing pictures. Not the best picture of me, I'll admit.

Mr. Whitecotton (as 52-year-old dying dentist 'Josh') says that you have to have a MD or a PhD degree to be a scientist. This was news to me. I asked my co-workers today if we were scientists and everybody agreed, archaeology is considered a social science. Anthropology, which archaeology is a sub-field of, is well known for borrowing from other sciences including biology, botany, geology, and anatomy. My training has included aspects of all of these fields, as well as historical research.

Let me bore you with some details. I have a master's degree from Arizona State University in Anthropology (1992). My thesis involved the analysis of 12,263 animal bones from a fur trading fort in North Dakota. I identified the bones to animal species where possible, skeletal element, portion and side, butchering methods, and a number of other attributes. Entered the data into the computer and conducted a number of statistical tests to identify statistically significant patterns, and then wrote and defended the thesis.

For my undergraduate degree at the University of Michigan (1986), I did an honor's thesis examining a prehistoric ossuary (a mass reburial of people, common in Michigan from about A.D. 1000-1600). The classwork I took allows me to identify portions of the human skeleton from small fragments, determine the sex and age of individuals, and identify pathological conditions such as arthritis, anemia, and healed fractures, all of which leave evidence on elements. I am frequently asked to excavate burials discovered in the Tucson area. I do this with skill and respect for the remains, often times I think about the person as I am uncovering their remains. That is perhaps the most unscientific thing about that aspect of my work, wondering what kind of lives those people led.

For my job of 15.5 years I have run a variety of archaeological projects. Many of these have been at complex sites with hundreds of features, often stretching back thousands of years. I have identified tens of thousands of artifacts and researched thousands of individuals for work. I have also given over 100 talks to the public and over a dozen at national scientific meetings, the most recent one in Albuquerque in January. The results of my archaeological and genealogical research has been published in dozens of reports. I have five books in the Library of Congress.

So yeah, I consider myself a scientist. It isn't something I boast about, no more than me saying I own a house or I have three cats. I've often thought that I would like my tombstone to read "Archaeologist, Genealogist, Homosexual" since these pretty much identify me.

I don't know I'm even bothering to write this.

I just feel sorry and somewhat repelled by this person. I don't understand the need to tell lies and call other bloggers names when they point out the truth and ask pointed questions (Why don't your pictures match? How can 'Marc' be dead when he is alive and living in Baltimore?). I look at his blogs the same way that I look at car accidents- fascinating, a bit weirded out, and sorry for everyone involved.

I guess the reason I'm mentioning this is that a few people on my blogroll link to a couple of Mark Whitecotton's blogs on their blogroll- "Smiley's Place" and "Defying Despondency." Perhaps they don't know that he uses my name in URLs and mentions my name and company name in tags, apparently trying bring search engines in and get me in trouble in some way. Ohmigod, so fucking lame.

Mark, maybe you need a big slice of lemon meringue pie. You know, it makes everybody feel better.

Later. I guess this big question is why would I bother making this stuff up? Such utter bullshit. The 300+ people who read my blog daily probably have a good sense of who I am. So readers, do you think I'm a liar?

I have been very disappointed in people lately. The current Cute Animal election is very important. Bunny and Squirrel are in a tight race for the Cutest nomination. The amount of animosity directed toward Squirrel by Bunny supporters has been an eye opener.

Erik (who is cuter than either Bunny or Squirrel) said "Besides, squirrels are just rats with fuzzy tails..." Stash said, "They're both technically vermin."

I know, I know, an endless entry about cute animals. But this has been on my mind for a couple of minutes and recently I have been shocked by some things I have seen.

It is like a zoo outside my window at work. Today I had house finches, mourning doves, a rabbit, and a pair of ground squirrels with enormous testicles (at least, I think that's what they are). At times when I was busy doing my work as a Research Archaeologist (that's what my business card says I do), I was peeking at the little critters eating bird seed.


Varmints.

And in homage to Mr. Chris Leavins,

Who is cuter?

Baby bunny.

OR


Boy squirrel.


Please vote in the comment section...

When I was a kid and played Star Trek I always wanted to be Uhura. She had the funnest job and when they were thrown around she always got thrown around the most dramatically. Evidence that I was a big homo even as a child.

I'm watching a truly awful original episode "The Galileo Seven." Even Joey meows at me, letting me know she thinks this one was a stinker. I have to get up in the middle of the night because my back starts to ache every night between 3 and 4 AM. I have to sit uprigt for awhile and the pain subsides. I guess I'll be discussing this with my doctor at my next physical.

The only other complaint I have is that my eyes have been getting increasingly "old." I put on my reading glasses and take them off and I have a hard time focusing again. That is very irritating, especially since I paid so much money for the damn spectacles. Oh well, at least I only have a few gray chest hairs.

Today's dessert- angel food cake and lemon curd.


12 yolk lemon curd, 12 egg white angelfood cake.

A co-worker is raising chickens and gave another co-worker a dozen eggs that I ended up with. I picked six lemons from the tree and away I went.


The cake.

It always surprises me how easy it is to make both. The cake is light and fluffy and a little sticky. The curd is sweet and tart and fairly rich. They are excellent together.

I have been very disappointed in people lately. The current presidential election is extremely important. Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama are in a tight race for the Democratic nomination. The amount of animosity directed toward Obama by some Clinton supporters has been an eye opener.

I guess Clinton supporters automatically assumed they she had the nomination. Well, presidential campaigns involve many basic things including organization, get-out-the-vote, fund-raising, and good speaking and debating skills. Clinton supporters have been surprised at the gradually increasing popularity of Obama. He has shown that he is a better campaigner- runs an excellent organization, manages resources well, and inspires people who are interested in his message. Plus he has been able to raise a huge amount of money.

The response of some people has been to denigrate Obama supporters (mindless, crazy, sheep, religious followers) and Obama (inexperienced, won't promise the same things as Clinton, won't promise different things from Clinton, too bipartisan, wife not proud enough, supporter not well versed on his legislative accomplishments, copies speeches, and etc.). Many of their complaints are false or petty.

It seems likely that the reverse situation is happening, but in the blogs and comments I have read, the comments against Mrs. Clinton are based on reality while those against Obama often are not (e.g., comparing him to Hitler) and at times I wonder whether his racial background has something to do with it.

Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama have very similar positions on most issues. Either could make a good president and would raise the image of the United States at home and abroad. I honestly have been impressed with Obama and not because of his speeches (I prefer to read background and position statements rather than listen to speeches and debates).

I like Hillary Clinton, but she is less electable against John McCain. Somewhere around 35 to 40 percent of the American population will not vote for her, there are many, many people who view Mrs. Clinton with distrust and anger, mostly for totally spurious and fictional reasons.

If Mrs. Clinton somehow gets the nomination, the likelihood of her getting elected is much, much less certain. I know many people who would vote for Obama, but who will not vote for Clinton. I am looking at this with a rational, unemotional viewpoint.

Whoever gets elected is in for an unpleasant time, with the economy getting worse and the mess in Iraq. But they also will be picking Supreme Court and other judges, and making basic decisions about civil rights, things that will effect most of the people who read this blog. This is why it is important for a Democrat to win above everything else.

I know, I know, an endless entry about politics. But this was been on my mind for a couple of weeks and recently I have been shocked by some things I have seen.

Cathi Herrod is a nasty, nasty person.


Herrod.

Arizona voters rejected the anti-gay marriage amendment in 2006. Karl Rove came to Arizona couple of weeks ago and chatted with Timothy Bee, the Arizona State Senate President. Bee is running against Democrat Gabrielle Gifford in the upcoming congressional election. Soon afterwards, Bee introduced another anti-gay marriage amendment. Do you think there was a connection between Rove's visit? The State Senate and House voted to place it on the ballot.

Ms. Herrod is ecstatic. For the last 20 years she has wasted her pathetic life fighting against every single measure that would provide gays and lesbians equality in Arizona. She claims to be a Christian. Really, she seems more Old Testament than New.

Years from now Cathi Herrod will be a footnote in some history book. People like her don't show up on stamps (last time I checked, there aren't any stamps featuring the Ku Klux Klan). I hope she lives long enough to see gay marriage legalized in the United States. Miserable, nasty thing.

Boldly go!

CBS has posted every episode of the original Star Trek series online for free viewing.

Also the first season of Hawaii 5-0. And McGyver. I am content.

Report cards.

Kindergarten, Mrs. Harrison [wonderful person]:

"Shows thoughtfulness and fairness to others." and "It would strengthen Homer's arms and legs to take part in a short period of strenuous exercise each day."

First grade, Mrs. Gray [hit me with a pen because I could add in my head]:

"Homer has an enjoyable sense of humor. Good sport- can laugh at himself."

Second grade, Mrs. Maier [encouraged me to read]:

"Homer makes delightful books, beautiful pictures, and good stories."

Third grade, Mrs. Fitch [nice woman]:

"He only missed one word."[in spelling, it was studying]

Fourth grade, Mr. Panter [don't remember him at all]:

"Could be encouraged to participate more."

Fifth grade, Mrs. Donahue [our health book was from the 1930s]:

Arithmetic A-
Language A-
Reading B+
Science & Health A-
Social Studies A-
Spelling S
Writing B
Band A

And Sixth grade, Mrs. Drake [mean, spiteful woman]:

Arithmetic B
Language B+
Reading A-
Social Studies B+
Spelling B+
Writing C+
Citizenship A

My great grandmother Grace.


Grace (1875-1929).


She died before my grandfather was married so she never met her four grandchildren. From stomach cancer- she'd had a hard life raising her three young children after her husband unexpectedly died from peritonitis in 1907. Later she married an older cousin, probably hoping things would get better.

She is young and beautiful in all of the pictures I have of her.

Grandma F., August 1968.



After Grandma died in January 1998, I went through her house searching for color slides. My mother, for who knows why, had thrown away the slides we had once had. "We don't have a projector" she had said when I asked her where they were. She also threw out almost all of the negatives. Sometimes you just want to say mean things.

So anyways, I found a handful of slides and took them, since I fully expected them to be thrown away too. Today our receptionist at work scanned them for me. The vivid color on some of them is surprising.

Grandma is 58 in this picture, standing in her garden at her house in Traverse City. I'm certain Grandpa F. took the slide, he was almost always behind the camera. That garden still produced vegetables and flowers when I was a kid. I well remember helping weed.

It's strange to think that other people live in Grandma's house and that I can never go back there, or even if I did it wouldn't be the same.

In case you are wondering, it smells like crap at the sewage plant.


Duck.

A leisurely stroll at the Sweetwater Wetlands was perhaps the most interesting part of the day.


Northern shovelers.

There were thousands of Northern Shoveler ducks there. I also saw a roadrunner, cinnamon teal, a hummingbird, a wading bird that had the birders all orgasmic, and lots of cute mud turtles.


Mud turtle.

I wish I had a better camera with a close up lens. But I don't (thanks Tax Refund Cat!).

Scream Puff.

Hates the camera.

Mama Cat (AKA Tax Refund Cat) does not like her medicines. The eye drops are the easiest. The oral antibiotic seems to go alright, although she usually reaches up trying to swat the syringe out of my hand. The third is the worst- I grind up pieces of two different pills, mix them with a little milk, and suck that up into a bigger syringe. This morning she spit most of it out onto me. Nice. The blood clot in one eye is slowly dissolving. The vision in her other eye comes and goes- today is a good day. The animal opthamologist has done every test possible and is unable to determine a cause.

The orange tomcat who lives outside has taken to peeing on my back door. My house already has that end-of-winter litter box odor. The addition of cat urine under the kitchen door has made it particularly fetid. So I mopped the floors, picking a few lemons off the tree and adding the juice to the water. I washed all the rugs and covers. I squirted citrus smelling stuff on the curtains and ceiling fan. I have some sliced up lemons and oranges sitting around. Hopefully the house will be presentable again.

Only a thin pane of glass saved me from the Killer Ground Squirrel.



Hungry after hibernation, everyone in Arizona knows better than to get close to one of these little varmints. They are wicked things, they'll lie to you, steal from you, sell your cats to a lipstick company. I looked up and it was examining me, probably wondering how much my kidneys would go for.

Lucky for that pane of glass.

It is Spring time in Arizona. Outside my office window little sparrows with red heads (and you know how much I like redheads) jump around eating the bird seed I left out for them. Yesterday I saw the first ground squirrel and the first gecko. The orange tree is getting ready to blossom.


Little red finch.

Tomorrow is the worst holiday ever invented. For single people. Why isn't there a similar holiday for us? Hallmark needs to get their act together- more cards to sell!

Banana Cream Pie!!! I declare this the year of pudding-filled pies.


Banana cream pie, 4 egg meringue.

I also declare this the year of:

- porn-staches. Moustaches are going to be big this year.
- cut off jean shorts. Let's revisit this intriguing fashion trend of the 70s.
- Helen Keller-Mama Cat jokes: How did Mama Cat burn her paws? Trying to read the waffle iron!

Mama Cat update. This morning I was lying in bed and Mama Cat climbed off of me and over the bed to the window sill. I wondered how she was able to do that so easily. Later, as I was getting ready to give her medicine, I realized her left eye was cleared up and she is regaining her vision.

Poor Mama Cat hates her medicine. She makes faces and tries to scratch me. I have to grind the tiny pill into powder and wipe that across her tongue. I'm sure she is saying cat swear words at me.

She goes back to the vet tomorrow. Her right eye still looks terrible (blood red) but perhaps that will also get better.

Post 1502. Words I hate:

-- "kudos" Often used in phrases like, "Kudos to XXXX for XXXX." Isn't this the name of a lame candy bar? It sounds really Greek to me. And although Greek men are really, really hot, they use a different alphabet that includes triangles for letters and when I was in Greece it took me forever to figure out what words were supposed to be in good American English.

-- "wombat" That poor animal is stuck with the stupidest sounding name ever. Luckily, wombats mostly live in Australia, like Sandy, so I don't have to see them regularly and have that strange name pop up in my head. Instead I get to see normal animals like javelina and gila monsters.

-- "scrotum" Let's make an interesting part of the male anatomy sound disgusting. In fact, most interesting parts of the male anatomy have disgusting scientific sounding names. Testicles. Glans. Etc.

-- "caucus" Another Greek-sounding word. Yes, I know they invented democracy and algebra, but this is America!!! I like the word "primary" much better.

There are many other words that I think should be banned from the liberal media so that I don't have to hear them. What ones do you dislike?

The pollster wanted to hear my opinion on whether I was interested in helping the liberal Democrats lose the house this year. Some Congressman's spiel included the horrors of gay marriage. Afterward a woman came on the line, "Mr. T----" she began to say.

I didn't give her a moment to speak. "I'm a gay man. I found your phone call to be very offensive. Take me off your goddamn list." Click.

In retrospect I should have chatted the woman up and wasted their money. But really, who needs to listen to such shit?

A canvasser tried to get Puff and Joey to vote for John McCain in today's primary. They meowed at him, "We think he belongs in the litter box!"


Puff, Joey, and a stray.

It is a rainy day in Tucson. I was sitting at my desk and there were a few moments of hail. A cute bird, whose head was covered with red feathers, perched on the tree outside my office window (it also had red feathers on its tummy).


Cute red bird. Later: Jimbo has identified the bird as a Vermillion Flycatcher (it's also a male).

At home I watched Mama Cat maneuver around the house. She still has partial vision in her right eye. I wanted to assure people that everything that can be done for her is being done. Last Friday the vet told me that something was wrong with the blood vessels in her left eye. I had her blood pressure taken (normal), blood and urine tests (slightly elevated protein in her urine, which is a sign that blood is being resorbed from her eye), and a glaucoma test done (the left high has elevated blood pressure, she is on a medicine to reduce that). She's going back to the vet again, although I'm not sure if anything else can be done. If the bleeding stops the blood will be resorbed and her eyesight will come back. The strange thing is my father had the same exact condition, although in his case it was from diabetes, and he ended up going blind at the end of his life.

To keep my mind busy I made a yellow cake with chocolate ganache frosting.



I should have trimmed the cake to make it more symetrical, but really, who notices?

A rare three-posts-in-one-day day

I voted for Barack Obama for the upcoming Arizona primary on Tuesday. In our state we can vote early and I was downtown at the courthouse last week (doing research, no, I wasn't on trial) and so I went and voted.



I like the guy. He's smart, articulate, has worked hard for poor and disenfranchised people. He's also my seventh cousin, but that doesn't have a lot to do with my decision. He also doesn't come with the baggage others are carrying. So that's it.

Something is wrong with Mama Cat. Last week she went to see the vet because she had a cold and a discharge from her right eye. That night she had a nose bleed. On Friday morning I discovered her right eye was filled with blood. Another visit to the vet where they couldn't find anything wrong. Today her left eye has started to fill with blood and she's obviously going blind.


Mama Cat, two weeks ago.

It breaks my heart.

Vintage beefcake.


Yale Varsity line-up, circa 1910s. [click image for full size]

The Library of Congress is putting photos on the Flickr website and I came across this one. I like the guy with the moustache the best.

Tombstone. Spent yesterday down in Tombstone- I'll be doing a small project around the courthouse.


Courthouse, built in 1882.

Very well known place. The town is doing a horrible job maintaining its historical character. When you walk down the street, with men dressed up as cowboys, and there are shows selling dragons and crystal balls, that kinda ruins the effect.