Thursday, February 27, 2014
Spring has arrived in Tucson.
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
I went to the protest with high hopes. When I moved to Tempe, Arizona in 1988 the Circle K convenience store chain announced that they were going to fire all homosexuals- to keep their insurance costs down because in their eyes, all homosexuals were diseased. Even though they quickly changed their mind, it was still a shocking wake up call.
At Arizona State University I joined the LGBT group and in the second year was its president. This was in the pre-internet days and the group was small, many members fearful of being found out. I went and spoke at psychology classes, where one male student asked me how gay men could have anal sex- "The butt is for excretion." I pointed out that the penis was used for sex and for urination. He was so stupid that he did not see the connection. There were other incidents- being called a sodomite by the student government vice president, having to confront the student newspaper editor about the paper's publishing the names, addresses, and majors of men caught having sex in bathrooms (he quickly backed down when I threatened a law suit).
I moved to Tucson and the Center for Arizona Policy was formed. The leader of the group, Cathi Herrod, is a fanatical fundamentalist who hates gay people. There is a Youtube video in which she says she was commanded by god to fight things like gay rights. When Tucson decided to offer joint library cards to same sex couples, she attempted to get the State Legislature to ban that. It was too close to same sex marriage in her beady eyes.
Efforts to have a constitutional amendment to ban same sex marriage and civil unions failed in 2006. In 2008, it passed after the Catholic Knights of Columbus and the Mormon Church blanketed the state with advertisements implying that gay folks were going to get the children of straight families.
It was very disheartening, to say the least when that passed. And in the years since I have celebrated as each new state legalized same sex marriage.
Last year a half hearted measure to put the marriage amendment on the ballot took place. I collected about 150 signatures, but in the end the organizers gave up- it was very disorganized.
This was supposed to be a video, but it turned into a slide show instead. You can see the moment the veto was announced.
And then the Center for Arizona Policy and the Alliance Defending Freedom got the Republicans to pass SB 1062. Government-sanctioned discrimination directed toward LGBT citizens and visitors. All of the testimony pointedly mentioned photographers, florists, and bakers who did not want to serve same sex couples. But after the bill's purpose became known, the backers and supporters all started lying and claiming it was not anti-gay, but defending "sincerely held religious beliefs." (Exactly how does the government determine whether a belief is sincere?).
The negative publicity brought to the State of Arizona has been humiliating. I have been very depressed, unable to focus my attention. Stressful, I found myself eating chocolate to medicate myself, lol.
And then today I drove by the protest on the way home, and then told my mother I was going back. Perhaps 75 to 100 people were assembled, mostly young people. One elderly woman, I stood next to a nurse and a vet tech. Nearby was a young couple with two kids, the cute father carrying a child with the sign "Baby Against Hate." When Jan Brewer announced that she had vetoed the bill, we all cheered.
The Center for Arizona Policy will never be able to get another anti-gay bill passed in Arizona. Cathi Herrod's power is slipping away. I sent her an email- ending it with HA HA HA. Yes, immature, but the knowledge that she knows that she is on the other side of history makes me so fucking happy.
At Arizona State University I joined the LGBT group and in the second year was its president. This was in the pre-internet days and the group was small, many members fearful of being found out. I went and spoke at psychology classes, where one male student asked me how gay men could have anal sex- "The butt is for excretion." I pointed out that the penis was used for sex and for urination. He was so stupid that he did not see the connection. There were other incidents- being called a sodomite by the student government vice president, having to confront the student newspaper editor about the paper's publishing the names, addresses, and majors of men caught having sex in bathrooms (he quickly backed down when I threatened a law suit).
I moved to Tucson and the Center for Arizona Policy was formed. The leader of the group, Cathi Herrod, is a fanatical fundamentalist who hates gay people. There is a Youtube video in which she says she was commanded by god to fight things like gay rights. When Tucson decided to offer joint library cards to same sex couples, she attempted to get the State Legislature to ban that. It was too close to same sex marriage in her beady eyes.
Efforts to have a constitutional amendment to ban same sex marriage and civil unions failed in 2006. In 2008, it passed after the Catholic Knights of Columbus and the Mormon Church blanketed the state with advertisements implying that gay folks were going to get the children of straight families.
It was very disheartening, to say the least when that passed. And in the years since I have celebrated as each new state legalized same sex marriage.
Last year a half hearted measure to put the marriage amendment on the ballot took place. I collected about 150 signatures, but in the end the organizers gave up- it was very disorganized.
And then the Center for Arizona Policy and the Alliance Defending Freedom got the Republicans to pass SB 1062. Government-sanctioned discrimination directed toward LGBT citizens and visitors. All of the testimony pointedly mentioned photographers, florists, and bakers who did not want to serve same sex couples. But after the bill's purpose became known, the backers and supporters all started lying and claiming it was not anti-gay, but defending "sincerely held religious beliefs." (Exactly how does the government determine whether a belief is sincere?).
The negative publicity brought to the State of Arizona has been humiliating. I have been very depressed, unable to focus my attention. Stressful, I found myself eating chocolate to medicate myself, lol.
And then today I drove by the protest on the way home, and then told my mother I was going back. Perhaps 75 to 100 people were assembled, mostly young people. One elderly woman, I stood next to a nurse and a vet tech. Nearby was a young couple with two kids, the cute father carrying a child with the sign "Baby Against Hate." When Jan Brewer announced that she had vetoed the bill, we all cheered.
The Center for Arizona Policy will never be able to get another anti-gay bill passed in Arizona. Cathi Herrod's power is slipping away. I sent her an email- ending it with HA HA HA. Yes, immature, but the knowledge that she knows that she is on the other side of history makes me so fucking happy.
Tuesday, February 25, 2014
Some Civil Rights facts about Arizona:
1). Between 1865 and 1956 it was illegal in Arizona for people of different races to marry.
2). From 1912 into the 1950s, schools were racially segregated.
3). Native Americans were not allowed to vote in Arizona until 1948.
4). Sodomy laws were finally repealed in 2001.
5). The 2006 anti-gay marriage amendment was voted down. The 2008 anti-marriage amendment passed after heavy advertising by the LDS and Catholic churches.
These are just some of the state-level civil rights problems we have had.
In 1976, a young man named Richard Heakin was beaten to death outside a Tucson gay bar by four teenagers and the judge let them off on probation because they had only killed a homosexual, not somebody who deserved to live.
There is a lot of hate and fear among white, religious people in this state. White people will soon be a minority. Young people have little tolerance for hate towards other people. Values have changed, but for many people the values they developed in the 1950s or 1960s have stuck and they find change repellent.
I have to admit, the last week or so has at times made me so discouraged. The blatant lies and the underlying hatred exposed, just makes me sad. On the other hand, the nation-wide outcry- something that would not have happened even five years ago, gives me hope that someday I will have the same civil rights as the people who want me to not have them.
1). Between 1865 and 1956 it was illegal in Arizona for people of different races to marry.
2). From 1912 into the 1950s, schools were racially segregated.
3). Native Americans were not allowed to vote in Arizona until 1948.
4). Sodomy laws were finally repealed in 2001.
5). The 2006 anti-gay marriage amendment was voted down. The 2008 anti-marriage amendment passed after heavy advertising by the LDS and Catholic churches.
These are just some of the state-level civil rights problems we have had.
In 1976, a young man named Richard Heakin was beaten to death outside a Tucson gay bar by four teenagers and the judge let them off on probation because they had only killed a homosexual, not somebody who deserved to live.
There is a lot of hate and fear among white, religious people in this state. White people will soon be a minority. Young people have little tolerance for hate towards other people. Values have changed, but for many people the values they developed in the 1950s or 1960s have stuck and they find change repellent.
I have to admit, the last week or so has at times made me so discouraged. The blatant lies and the underlying hatred exposed, just makes me sad. On the other hand, the nation-wide outcry- something that would not have happened even five years ago, gives me hope that someday I will have the same civil rights as the people who want me to not have them.
Friday, February 21, 2014
How not to have a protest.
Tucson's LGBT center WINGSPAN used to be run by an excellent staff, used to actually do things. Under the current director long-time staff members have been fired or quit, they flubbed the collection of signatures to repeal the anti-gay marriage amendment. The place is invisible.
They organized a last minute protest of SB 1072. Their website announced the protest while not providing clear directions as to where it was being held. It started at 4:00 PM, marching from their headquarters to the Arizona State Office Building. When I found out where they were at, I left my house at 5:10 to get there. As I drove up, the marchers were already leaving.
There were the news cameras waiting to cover the event, and the marchers were walking away. And then there was the biggest sign being carried:
BASH BACK
Ohmigod. What a fiasco. What is ironic is that WINGSPAN has two staff members who work on anti-violence programs.
They organized a last minute protest of SB 1072. Their website announced the protest while not providing clear directions as to where it was being held. It started at 4:00 PM, marching from their headquarters to the Arizona State Office Building. When I found out where they were at, I left my house at 5:10 to get there. As I drove up, the marchers were already leaving.
There were the news cameras waiting to cover the event, and the marchers were walking away. And then there was the biggest sign being carried:
Ohmigod. What a fiasco. What is ironic is that WINGSPAN has two staff members who work on anti-violence programs.
Thursday, February 20, 2014
So the Arizona legislature has passed a bill that would allow people with "sincere" religious beliefs to discriminate against anyone. Of course, the bill is meant to target LGBT folks.
Currently, according to the Arizona Attorney General's website, it is illegal to discriminate based on:
- race
- color
- national origin/ancestry
- sex
- religion/creed
- physical or mental disability
I'm not a lawyer, so I can't tell whether this new law makes these prohibitions against discrimination moot. I have a feeling that these are based on Federal laws, but honestly I am too tired to look this up.
In any case, LGBT people are not covered. It is completely legal to fire someone because they are gay. To deny them housing.
I don't know whether Governor Brewer will sign this. I suspect she will, unless pressure is put onto her by major business interests.
It is embarrassing to live in a state where fundamentalist Christians promote hate with such glee.
Currently, according to the Arizona Attorney General's website, it is illegal to discriminate based on:
- race
- color
- national origin/ancestry
- sex
- religion/creed
- physical or mental disability
I'm not a lawyer, so I can't tell whether this new law makes these prohibitions against discrimination moot. I have a feeling that these are based on Federal laws, but honestly I am too tired to look this up.
In any case, LGBT people are not covered. It is completely legal to fire someone because they are gay. To deny them housing.
I don't know whether Governor Brewer will sign this. I suspect she will, unless pressure is put onto her by major business interests.
It is embarrassing to live in a state where fundamentalist Christians promote hate with such glee.
Thursday, February 13, 2014
One of the bobcats keeps walking by my window at work. It is male, or at least it pees like one.
Bobcat.
At work I spent time adding numbers up for tables and matching the numbers in the text. Science!
While the rest of the country is freezing and snowy, it is in the 80s here in Tucson. I'm hoping this will help with the horrendous electricity bills ($300 last month, $200 this month).
I left work early and the modern streetcar was ahead of me. They are testing the new cars, training the drivers. Can't wait for it to begin.
Streetcar.
I took mother to the Gem and Fossil show, instructing her not to touch anything. Some of the things on display had price tags around $80,000.
Mother is not a fossil.
She found something to buy and then complained about how hot it was. We went to three different places and saw the same stuff in many of them. Not sure who buys all of those random rocks.
Dinner tonight: scalloped potatoes, asparagus, and gluten free chocolate chip cookies. Mother liked her supper.
Thursday, February 06, 2014
I just finished a genealogy book I have been working on for several years. It provides information on people who died in the part of northern Michigan I grew up in between 1845 and 1870. I was surprised when I counted the number and it was about 730. Feels good to have a project finished. Now I need to print copies and mail them off to various libraries.
Patrick gave me some dress shirts and bow ties and I purchased a pair of vests from the Victorian Emporium and have been dressing up for work two or three times a week. People at work were freaked out over this- "Are you interviewing for a job?" Archaeologists are not known for wearing nice clothes.
Patrick gave me some dress shirts and bow ties and I purchased a pair of vests from the Victorian Emporium and have been dressing up for work two or three times a week. People at work were freaked out over this- "Are you interviewing for a job?" Archaeologists are not known for wearing nice clothes.
Dressy me and Buddy.
Really, dress clothes are just a form of drag, just like wearing t-shirts and jeans is a form of archaeology drag. So no, I wasn't dressing up for job interviews.
Mother continues to confound me at times. She fell down today because of low blood sugar. At least this time she didn't fall on her face. She once told me she walks with her hands behind her back so that if she falls down she won't break her arms. Instead she gets huge black and blue marks on her face. SIGH.
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
I drove home later than normal, held up by a meeting. The sunset was gorgeous.
Tucson sunset, through the windshield.
I think I had my mid-life crisis today, thinking about something. I talked with Forrest about life and things, it was nice to catch up with him.
A few minutes later.
I feel like my life is on hold every winter. It is hard taking care of my mother- extra cleaning, all the cooking, watching out for her when we are public. She totters around slowly and gets lost in stores, cannot figure out where to find the front. She isn't getting senile, she just doesn't care to remember.
I've been going through my box of photographs and scanning the older family photos to post on Ancestry. I used to take pictures of family photos- and I have come across a bunch that probably ended up with my one uncle, the one who wanted everything. Glad I was smart and took those photos myself. Strange to handle actual prints in today's digital world.
Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and thoughts race through my head. Things I cannot change and things I have no control over. I've been doing a lot of reading- you can only sit in front of the computer for so many hours a day. It calms the mind down and after an hour I go back to sleep. If I doze too long in the morning, nightmares show up. Usually Puff and Joey wake me anyway, tentatively prodding me with their paws to get me to pay attention.
So anyways, not sure whether my day-long mid-life crisis will come to anything. It certainly has me thinking about what is important and what isn't.
I think I had my mid-life crisis today, thinking about something. I talked with Forrest about life and things, it was nice to catch up with him.
A few minutes later.
I feel like my life is on hold every winter. It is hard taking care of my mother- extra cleaning, all the cooking, watching out for her when we are public. She totters around slowly and gets lost in stores, cannot figure out where to find the front. She isn't getting senile, she just doesn't care to remember.
I've been going through my box of photographs and scanning the older family photos to post on Ancestry. I used to take pictures of family photos- and I have come across a bunch that probably ended up with my one uncle, the one who wanted everything. Glad I was smart and took those photos myself. Strange to handle actual prints in today's digital world.
Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and thoughts race through my head. Things I cannot change and things I have no control over. I've been doing a lot of reading- you can only sit in front of the computer for so many hours a day. It calms the mind down and after an hour I go back to sleep. If I doze too long in the morning, nightmares show up. Usually Puff and Joey wake me anyway, tentatively prodding me with their paws to get me to pay attention.
So anyways, not sure whether my day-long mid-life crisis will come to anything. It certainly has me thinking about what is important and what isn't.
Monday, January 20, 2014
Isaac Clawson and Anna Rollenhagen, one pair of my great-great parents were married on New Year's Eve in 1885.
The marriage was recorded in the Muskegon County, Michigan marriage records.
Marriage records (click on picture to see larger version).
A fancy document was probably supplied by the Minister of the Gospel as a wedding souvenir.
The marriage was recorded in the Muskegon County, Michigan marriage records.
Marriage records (click on picture to see larger version).
A fancy document was probably supplied by the Minister of the Gospel as a wedding souvenir.
Certificate of marriage.
Isaac was 31-years-old. He was born in 1855 in Ohio. His father, Hiram Clawson, went off to fight in the Civil War in 1862 and two years later died from measles in Knoxville, Tennessee. He left behind a 32-year-old widow with four children. She moved her family to Michigan to be close to her parents and sisters. Six months after her husband's death, she married again to Fuller Porter. Widows didn't have many options. Paulina (Bates) Clawson's second husband was a drunk and a bully. They would divorce in August 1885, Paulina testified that: "disregarding the solemnity of his marriage vow... at various times neglected to support (Perlina) and to furnish her a home although he is an able bodied man and has enjoyed good health almost all the time since her marriage..her said husband moved all his furniture, including the only cooking stove in the house and left (her) entirely destitute (the house was a rented one).."
Isaac Clawson (sitting) and an unidentified man, circa 1875-1880. The standing man has a device behind him to hold his head still for the photograph.
Anna Maria Dortea Rollenhagen was born in New York, four years after her parents and older siblings sailed from a tiny town in Prussia, the youngest child dying and being buried at sea. The family moved on to Michigan, the surroundings very similar to the little village of Brusewitz that they had left behind forever.
Fractur document.
The couple would go on to have 12 children between 1886 and 1913: Maybelle, Myrtle, Mildred, Claude, Lillian, Robert, Arzey, Richard, Frederick, Margaret, Ina, Edwin, and Edith. Maude and Richard died in infancy. My great grandmother Maybelle was born eight months after the marriage, so Isaac and Anna were obviously having sex before marriage. Or as my mother says, "The first child can come out at any time."
Isaac worked as a farmer and sometimes as a carpenter. My grandmother recalled him building a child's coffin for a neighbor, lining it with a lacy blouse. He was also apparently a problem drinker, and would beat Anna when drunk.
Anna and Isaac Clawson.
My mother remembers the couple- Isaac died in 1936 and Anna in 1938. She was asked as the oldest great grandchild to carry a rose in to her while Anna was confined to bed.
Thursday, January 16, 2014
So Arizona state Representative Steve Yarbrough wants to pass a law that would allow religious people to discriminate against gay people.
I sent him the following email:
Dear Mr. Yarbrough,
In regards to your bill that would allow people to refuse service to gay folks due to their religious views. I would ask that as part of your bill you would require these businesses to prominently display a large sign stating which groups of people they would refuse service to.
As a gay man, I really would hate to bother a fundamentalist Christian or Mormon or even a Muslim business owner by walking into their place of business. I'm certain that even looking or talking to me, a 50-year-old homosexual, would violate their religious beliefs. What if I accidentally shook their hands and they touched a gay person without realizing it?
You or your staff member reading this are probably grossed out by the fact that a Homosexual sent you an email. I suggest that your next bill will be one preventing LGBT people from contacting their elected officials.
And as a side note, I wonder how much time and money the State of Arizona will spend defending this unconstitutional law. Because the Federal Constitution clearly states that everyone is supposed to be treated equally.
Sincerely,
Homer
I sent him the following email:
Dear Mr. Yarbrough,
In regards to your bill that would allow people to refuse service to gay folks due to their religious views. I would ask that as part of your bill you would require these businesses to prominently display a large sign stating which groups of people they would refuse service to.
As a gay man, I really would hate to bother a fundamentalist Christian or Mormon or even a Muslim business owner by walking into their place of business. I'm certain that even looking or talking to me, a 50-year-old homosexual, would violate their religious beliefs. What if I accidentally shook their hands and they touched a gay person without realizing it?
You or your staff member reading this are probably grossed out by the fact that a Homosexual sent you an email. I suggest that your next bill will be one preventing LGBT people from contacting their elected officials.
And as a side note, I wonder how much time and money the State of Arizona will spend defending this unconstitutional law. Because the Federal Constitution clearly states that everyone is supposed to be treated equally.
Sincerely,
Homer
Monday, January 13, 2014
Last Thursday I went to the dentist to get a crown. Two hours work, mostly not painful. Temporary crown is in place and slightly elevated so I cannot close the right side of my mouth correctly. $490 total, I think.
A good impression.
On Saturday morning I loaded mother into the car and drove north to Steam Pump Ranch, where I gave a talk to a standing room only crowd. We had to walk a ways to get to the restored ranch house. My mother's walking skills have declined- she staggers around, seemingly off balance. Awfully slow. I've noticed that in the house, outdoors it is worse. Several times I have had to grab her to keep her from falling over. If something else catches her attention, she seems to lose control of her feet. This whole aging business- pretty depressing to see up close.
After the talk and a stagger through the farmer's market we went to the Presidio Park and visited with the living history folks. My mother chatted with the women she has met before and had a good time. I tried on a pair of reproduction glasses and have decided my next new pair will have round frames.
Toast by Mary Teresa Dietz.
I probably shouldn't be buying luxury items when work has slowed down so much. But what is the point of living unless you enjoy life. I am going to hang it above my desk at home so I can look at it every day.
A good impression.
On Saturday morning I loaded mother into the car and drove north to Steam Pump Ranch, where I gave a talk to a standing room only crowd. We had to walk a ways to get to the restored ranch house. My mother's walking skills have declined- she staggers around, seemingly off balance. Awfully slow. I've noticed that in the house, outdoors it is worse. Several times I have had to grab her to keep her from falling over. If something else catches her attention, she seems to lose control of her feet. This whole aging business- pretty depressing to see up close.
After the talk and a stagger through the farmer's market we went to the Presidio Park and visited with the living history folks. My mother chatted with the women she has met before and had a good time. I tried on a pair of reproduction glasses and have decided my next new pair will have round frames.
Homer Roosevelt in blue.
On Sunday I went and visited David and picked some oranges off his tree. Later I made marmalade, which is really very easy- just thinly sliced oranges, sugar, boil until it reaches 220 degrees, can.
Orange Marmalade.
When we were at the library last week I saw a painting I really liked. I hardly ever buy things for myself, but I really, really liked this painting. So I bought it.
I probably shouldn't be buying luxury items when work has slowed down so much. But what is the point of living unless you enjoy life. I am going to hang it above my desk at home so I can look at it every day.
Sunday, January 05, 2014
Let's make Homer's Spanish rice.
First clean the stove top because Mummy has spilled coffee and other stuff everywhere and never, ever thinks to wipe up the mess.
Then slice a leek, half an onion, some miniature red and yellow peppers, and a Mexican squash up and saute in some olive oil.
Squash has not been put in yet.
When those pretty vegetables have softened, add these canned products. I drain the black beans first. Sneak some of "that stuff" (spices) in when Mummy isn't looking. She hates spices and herbs, like many Midwesterners of her generation raised in households with bland boiled foods.
Rice!
When the rice is cooked, place in with other ingredients. Finish off with some shredded cheese.
When those pretty vegetables have softened, add these canned products. I drain the black beans first. Sneak some of "that stuff" (spices) in when Mummy isn't looking. She hates spices and herbs, like many Midwesterners of her generation raised in households with bland boiled foods.
Blurry!
While this is going on, cook one cup of Jasmine rice in 1.5 cups water.
When the rice is cooked, place in with other ingredients. Finish off with some shredded cheese.
Homer's blurry Spanish Rice.
Quick, easy, nutritious, and tasty.
Saturday, January 04, 2014
I went to the barber for a trim. Patrick called me asking if I was interested in continuing to work on his doors.
Shorn.
Last time I used chemical stripper to remove the paint. It was messy and not terribly effective. This time I used my trusty heat gun to peel up the layers of paint.
Door with top layers of paint removed.
I sanded as well, so Patrick made me a make-shift dust mask. I look like a robber.
Stick 'em up.
I peeled and sanded, then worked paint out of the little nooks and crannies and sanded some more. Patrick is going to paint them again, so I did not need to remove every little bit of paint (the wood quality isn't good enough to stain).
First side done.
I'll go back next weekend and finish the other side, I removed about 1/4 of the paint on that side before coming home to make Mummy supper.
Patrick testing the fire alarm.
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Well another year is over. Can't say I am sad to see 2013 go. It was a year of disappointment and no real progress. A lot of the goals I had set for myself (get a book completed, save money) fell by the wayside. Some other stuff happened too. Turning 50 and experiencing one of the dullest birthdays ever, well that was a thrill. Suddenly single. Breaking a tooth. Trying to be patient with mother in her elderly-ness.
There were a few highlights. Teaching field school and meeting a younger generation. Interesting to see how things have changed, including attitudes. A trip to see Forrest and Travis. A trip to see LeGrand. Some new old clothes. Getting some work done on the house and yard. That article in American Ancestors magazine. The All Souls party (although I was less of a fan of the actual Procession).
If you had asked me a year ago about certain things I would not have thought they would happen they way they did. But life is full of unexpected events and you cannot predict things. If someone had told me nine states would legalize same sex marriage including Utah (Utah!) I probably would not have believed them.
Not making any resolutions or goals. Why set yourself up for disappointment? Here's hoping that 2014 is better than 2013. If you happen to read this, I wish you a Happy New Year.
There were a few highlights. Teaching field school and meeting a younger generation. Interesting to see how things have changed, including attitudes. A trip to see Forrest and Travis. A trip to see LeGrand. Some new old clothes. Getting some work done on the house and yard. That article in American Ancestors magazine. The All Souls party (although I was less of a fan of the actual Procession).
If you had asked me a year ago about certain things I would not have thought they would happen they way they did. But life is full of unexpected events and you cannot predict things. If someone had told me nine states would legalize same sex marriage including Utah (Utah!) I probably would not have believed them.
Not making any resolutions or goals. Why set yourself up for disappointment? Here's hoping that 2014 is better than 2013. If you happen to read this, I wish you a Happy New Year.
Annual end-of-year self portrait.
Saturday, December 28, 2013
Well I get to have a crown put on my tooth on January 9. The dentist filed down the sharp edges so until then I won't be gouging out my cheek.
At home I am stir crazy and lonely. My mother continues in her elderly-ness. For some reason the city did not pick up recycling and she asked me if I had bounced a check. I asked her if she knew how rude that was, that I had not bounced a check in 25 years (Actually, I believe it was in 1986). I know exactly how much money I have or don't have.
I wonder sometimes whether she is the least bit self-aware. Very frustrating dealing with minor things that in my mother's mind are so major that she automatically gives up. I hope I don't get like this when I am old.
And it is so quiet here. He doesn't call me. Guess I am forgotten now. I come across the notes he wrote me in unexpected places. I thought about gathering them up and sending them back. I erased some pictures. It didn't make me feel better. You would think after six months I would be numb or maybe just over it, but I am not.
I don't have any big dreams for the next year. I've got to change some things I guess.
At home I am stir crazy and lonely. My mother continues in her elderly-ness. For some reason the city did not pick up recycling and she asked me if I had bounced a check. I asked her if she knew how rude that was, that I had not bounced a check in 25 years (Actually, I believe it was in 1986). I know exactly how much money I have or don't have.
I wonder sometimes whether she is the least bit self-aware. Very frustrating dealing with minor things that in my mother's mind are so major that she automatically gives up. I hope I don't get like this when I am old.
And it is so quiet here. He doesn't call me. Guess I am forgotten now. I come across the notes he wrote me in unexpected places. I thought about gathering them up and sending them back. I erased some pictures. It didn't make me feel better. You would think after six months I would be numb or maybe just over it, but I am not.
I don't have any big dreams for the next year. I've got to change some things I guess.
Wednesday, December 25, 2013
So I'm sitting at my desk typing away, eating a Frito, and I bite into a rock, I think. I spit it out and then realize my mouth feels weird. Geez, I just broke the corner off of my left first maxillary molar.
The offending cusp.
I've only had one dental caries since 1985 and I think it was actually this took that got worked on last year. Anyways, it feels so strange- I can feel the sharp edge of the filling scraping the inside of my cheek.
Hopefully, my dentist is open tomorrow and I can get this fixed before I go crazy. Crown or root canal- I can hardly wait.
Honestly, I have been dreading the holidays. It all seemed to be rote- get a tree, make some cards, buy some presents, put up some lights.
I made some more snowman cards. I am creative.
Snowman!
Doug came over and we opened presents. Then I dressed up and went over to Richard's house for his annual party, taking some vanilla meringues with me.
Mummy's tree and presents.
Doug came over and we opened presents. Then I dressed up and went over to Richard's house for his annual party, taking some vanilla meringues with me.
Richard's 12-foot-tall tree.
I was over-dressed and hot, so I went outside and made some artsy light photos.
Colorful.
I ate a little cookie covered in powdered sugar and it got on my vest.
Sparkle.
I got nice presents- a Lincoln Log set, a pair of Smokey Bear salt and pepper shakers, and a vintage blue plate.
Presents.
We opened the Lincoln Logs and just as the comments on Amazon suggested, the number of small pieces vastly outnumbered the larger ones. Weird.
Smokey and Smokey.
I have alternated between being sad and lonely, and having an alright time. At the moment, cheesey cauliflower and gluten-free stuffing is re-heating in the oven for supper (we always eat fancy lunch on Holiday).
Now two days off, then the weekend. Have to think of something interesting to do.
Friday, December 20, 2013
Let's make caramelized onions.
First buy a bunch of onions on sale, some cider vinegar, and a big bag of sugar. Also go to Ace Hardware and buy canning jar lids.
Chop up a lot of onions.
First buy a bunch of onions on sale, some cider vinegar, and a big bag of sugar. Also go to Ace Hardware and buy canning jar lids.
Chop up a lot of onions.
Some of them made me cry.
During the two days that I have been doing this New Mexico and Utah became the latest states legalizing same sex marriage. I wonder if Brian Brown is blubbering away?
Put the onions, four cups sugar, three cups cider, and two teaspoons salt in your big pot and turn on the gas. The kitchen fills with steam.
Starting to cook.
The house is already overheated because my mother has her electric heater on 24-hours-a-day in the living room and huddles under her electric heating pad. It is so hot I have to walk around in a t-shirt. Buddy likes sitting there, all warm. I have to send him outside with a piece of cheese so he can go to his doghouse.
Cooked down.
I add more onions as the liquid evaporates. Then they cook down until they are dark brown. Tonight Mummy criticized my onions, because they were not dark enough. "I'm going to find a better recipe." I did not take this kindly. I told her I was sensitive about being criticized, "When you are a teenager and your father tells you repeatedly you are a worthless piece of shit, you tend to be sensitive." She said, "If I had known how much like his mother he turned out to be, I would never have married your father."
Arthur sent me an awesome lid holder- no more burned fingers for me! Thank you Arthur! XOXO (This will likely be the best Holiday present I get this year).
Arthur's lid holder.
I used my old canning kettle instead of the new pressure cooker that someone gave me as a mystery gift for my birthday (I have no clue who sent me that awesome present, was it you Arthur?). I sterilized the jars first, before pulling them out, filling them, wiping the rim, seating the lids, and screwing the rings on (gosh, that sounds dirty!).
Sterilization!
Twenty four cups of onions makes nine pints (seven jars) of caramelized onions.
The lids go pop!
Well this is what a lonely gay man does on a Friday night before a major set of holidays.
